A man appeared before St Peter at the Pearly Gates

"Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St Peter asked...

Well, I can think of one thing." The man offered. "Once, on a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers, who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So, I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker, and smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground.. I yelled, “Now, back off... Or I'll kick the shit out of all of you!”

St Peter was impressed, " When did this happen?” . . . .

The man answered back “Just a couple of minutes ago ...”